2003-12-22
Happy birthday Jesus!!(don't touch my car fucker!)
Happy birthday Jesus!!!That's right,it's almost that time o'year when we celebrate the birth of that hispanic guy who lives down the street,and is always decorating his lawn with empty tequila bottles and hubcaps he's stolen from locals.
We celebrate by putting out plastic statues of fat bearded men and reindeer,because we all know how much Jesus has an attraction to fat guys,and an uncontrollable hunger for venison,and the only way we can deter him from breaking into our homes,via-chimney or back window,and stealing our posessions is to cover a fat,bearded man in the blood of a freshly slaughtered reindeer,thus the meretricious lawn ornaments of "santa",and his herd.
Well,I hope you all get whatever your precious ,greedy little hearts desire.I know what I'm getting for this obligatory gift day,The Flu!!!!!!
Yayyyyyy!!!
Merry fucking Christmas!!!!!
Happy birthday Jesus!!!
p.s.Stay the fuck away from my car!,it's not worth your divine intervention or whatever!
12:03 a.m. 
by Timm Jumper
