2006-04-26
Stars
I was riding in the back of My friend River's car tonight after a little trip with him and his girlfriend and out of boredom I layed back and stared out the window at the stars.I remembered all the times I would do this when I was younger, riding with my parents to wherever we might be going.
I realized I han't done that in years and nostalgia turned into sadness.
Itried to imagine the last time I stared though those lines on the window as my eyes relaxed they appear to lift up to the stars and form a grid of sorts in which I'd line up the stars.
I saw the exact same thing I did then.
The exact same patterns and constilations and flickers of light.
Everything has changed.
Every innocent happy thought, dream, almost every friend I've had.
Life happened and I don't see a single thing even remotely similar, but those stars, on my little grid, those spoons and bulls and archers are exactly the same.
I pictured my image staring back, and how it hasn't even come close to reaching those stars, still millions of years away.
I'm still a child staring at the heavens slowly floating towards them.
I want to cath up with myself, tell him to never look back at who's looking now, or maybe just stop altogether and just stop everything until something down here looks better.
I wish I could offer the stars something as wonderful and constent as what they've given me.
10:38 p.m. 
by Timm Jumper
