2006-02-15
Happy heart!
"Happy heart!Happy Happy Heart!"
This is being joyfully shouted by what might be the coolest,sweetest old lady I've ever had the pleasure of meeting in my life.
Me and Granma, in a bar, Valentines day,yesterday,(note this is the 3rd Valentinies day in a row spent with my Grand mother), arrive in one of her frequent "watering holes" for happy hour, to humorously find an 85 year old woman "dressed to the nines" in red and white.
From Bonnet to gogo boots,laced hearted gloves, flowing red gown with matching stockings, ruby red lipstick, and a smile so bright it could guide ships to shore.
She had a hand full of red and white balloons,( which she later left loose to "decorate" the bar), and bags of animated plush toys to entertain the patrons.
She would set them on the bar,press the hands, watch them dance and sing, and mimic them with her own song and dance.
She refused many offers to sit.
"I never sit!", she proudly ,loudly proclaimed, and sipped from her coors light on the rocks.
She had such energy and personality, I only wish I had that kind of vigor at nearly a quarter her age.
She would randomly sing between converations, and eventually started one with us.
My grandmother told her stories of how she remembered the restauraunt she onced owned, and how she onced worked for her for several weeks until an angry house wife stormed in, accusing my g-ma of sleeping with her husband, thus chasing her off, never to return to work there again.
The old lady hung to me for awhile, singing and remenising of dead friends and old flames.
"I've only been with 7 in my life, and they're all dead!",she shouted, "That's not too bad, some women have 7 a day!!"
Everyone knew her and everyone adored her.
She is a regular and has a habit of dressing up for every holiday and entertaining the hell out of everyone.
She was such a sweetheart.
I'll have to post pictures as soon as she sends them, which is another hobbie of hers, taking pictures of people she meets, getting their name, address, and birthday, then sending them copies.
I can't wait to see her again, she made me smile so much it almost hurt.
Later that evening after returning home, I recieved a call from a friend a hadn't hung out with in 3 years, she invited me down to a bar in Gettysburg.
To skip past all the insignifcant detail, I ended up playing pool with Jesus.
He was drunker then holy hell, and I could not understand the majority of what he was saying.We decided to play teams, and guess who was on my side?
Yes, Jesus was on my side finally.
Although I never knew he was a 5 foot tall, chubby, drunken, mexican with a mustache, who liked to try to kiss my friends neck tattoos,(to her extreme discomfort).
He kept trying to converse with me, but it made absolutely no sense.
I think the only thing I really understood from my conversation with Jesus was "Hotel California by the Eagles is an awesome song, and you have to make sure you visually line up a shot when playing billards.
He would point to the spot of the ball I should aim for, and drunken Jesus with a mustache it worked!
I said "Jesus!,your a good guide!"
After the second game, me and my friend got rather fed up with his uncomfortable advances on her, and his silly random dancing and uncomprehensible blend of spanish/english drunken gibberish, so we went back to her house where I hugged,
and kissed,
and petted....
her big fluffy dog!
He was such a cute woofy woof!
A mix of retreiver and some other large beast.
He looked like a bear, but cuddled like a bunny.
His back legs didn't work well due to his age ,and he had trouble getting up, so I lyed on the floor and loved him silly!
Wow this is a long fucking entry.
I just didn't want to miss one detail!
So in closure, what started off as me feeling that obligatory "Damn it's valentines day ,I'm still alone, I'll most likely spend it with g-ma again drunk" ended up being one of the best Valentines I've ever had!
See, there's no need for "true love" or "the special somone" to define you and be your entire life, balance you out and love you for eternity, to have a good Valentines day.
All you truly need is your a grandma, a singing danicing 85 year old woman, an old friend, a big fluffy dog, an of course Jesus .
Oh, it also helps if you by a bottle of shiraz and drink the whole thing before you meet up with your friend.
Happy Heart everyone!
Happy happy heart!!
10:09 p.m. 
by Timm Jumper
