2003-01-20
sorry
I must apologize for writing such a horrible entry this morning.I was in a really bad mood,and things just overwhelmed me.
I'm afraid I feel too much alot of times ,and dwell on things that need not be dwelled upon.
I'm just having trouble beliving in anything I always thought worthwhile.
That's kind of what I meant by "certain truth's"
Like discovering what lie's beneath every dream,seeing what is usually blinded out by hope.
Realizing some of my real intentions to not be as sweet as I made them out to be.
My friends,thats about all I can truly have faith in anymore,yet I feel I hurt them sometimes becuse i'm not happy with myself and don't take care of myself at all.
I let certain feelings get in the way and fear I'm not being as honest as I should.
I know it's not as bad as I think,and they love me regardless.
I love them too.
I'm just confused on what love is right now.
I write all those songs about something I don't even know if I belive in anymore.I word invented by dreaming,poets and hopless-romantics,like me.
Ok I know If I ever pull htru this,I will learn a very important lesson,and be a better person because of it.That's if I pull thru,I hope I will.
I love you
11:01 p.m. 
by Timm Jumper
